Mother's day idea that you need to shake your tail feathers if you want to gift it this year

Shake a tail feather.  Funny story about shaking tail feathers since you all brought up Tina Turner...

Back in the day a Seattle radio station used to play a game where they listed three things and you had to figure out what they had in common.  You could call in and win "fabulous prizes" if you could figure out the connection.  In 6th grade, I thought up a question, called in (no email in those days) and left a message with my hilarious question.

A few weeks later they used it.

And I called in.

And I won.

You're dying to know what my three were, aren't you?  Ok, ready?  Remember...this was the 90's.

Question:  What do music stores, courthouses, and Tonya Harding all have in common?
Answer:  They all have records.

Tonya Harding joke, whaaaaa? 

The fabulous prize?  A VHS of What's Love Got to do With it.  The Tina Turner story.  Super appropriate for an 11 year old.

What were we talking about before you starting pestering me about Tina Turner?  Oh yes, Mother's Day gifts.

This year, I'm giving my mother-in-law a vat of homemade vanilla extract.  She pretty much used a ton of mine up when we live with them briefly last spring.  She also has everything she could ever need, and I know this is something she'd actually want.  I'm going to get a pretty bottle for storage, and attach this note to it:

A mother-in-law is like a great batch of vanilla
They add flavor to things
They make life delicious
They're 97% booze

My mother-in-law likes her a little bit of wine.  She always puts me on notice to cut her off after half of a glass, or things get crazy!  Usually the fourth or fifth kiss on my cheek and snuggles is a glaring clue to hide her two buck chuck.

ahem

Anyhoo, if you'd like to gift this to your mother-in-law, you best get started now so that it is ready by the big day!*

*Confession, I had to call it the "big day" because I don't know when Mother's Day is.  May something or other?